Goodbye, Whitney Elizabeth.

When I was about thirteen or fourteen years old, I was a huge Whitney Houston fan. I was a member of her fan club for a year after My Love is Your Love came out, and even through all of her struggles personally, I was able to enjoy her body of work without letting the bad parts of her cloud that original image in my mind.

I follow the celebrity world so closely that I did not find out as early as some people about her death. I've been so busy, and the day it happened I had been helping my sister and her family move into a new apartment. I had to take something over to my aunt and uncle's house that evening, and their big screen is visible from the front door. So as soon as I open the door, before I even say hello, I see on CNN "Whitney Houston 1963-2012" and I felt my heart fall into my stomach. I have so many memories that are tied in closely with celebrity events that there are not a lot of them I remember vividly. I do remember the exact moment I found out John Ritter died and the exact moment I found out Rue McClanahan died, and I'm sure this memory of Whitney's death will always stick out in my mind as well. Even three days later, I cannot get Whitney out of my head.

In middle and high school, before I got into Stevie Nicks, I had seven women that I adored. Of course Bette and Meryl were two of them; there was also Susan Sarandon, Shirley MacLaine, Mimi Rogers, Joan Cusack, and Whitney. I doodled their names like a little schoolgirl and was always coming up with different ways to arrange their initials to make some sort of anagram to discreetly put their names on my notebooks without seeming like a total weirdo. I felt a connection to Whitney because our birthdays were just a few days apart and because we had the same middle name. To me, she was THE voice. I mean, don't get me wrong. I adore Bette, but for actual vocal ability, Whitney blew everyone else out of the water. Such talent, such control. No one else will ever touch her in my mind.

So today I'm listening to Whitney, remembering what she meant to me, and remembering what a fantastic spirit she had before her life was taken over by drugs. As corny as it is, and as many people as have already said this, I will always love you, Whitney.