Visions of Showgirls

I didn't get up until 2:30 today. Go me.

Do you ever look at someone's face so much that one day you think you know every pore, every line, every curve, and then the next you don't think you'll ever remember what they look like again? I'm like that with Bette Midler. I have studied that woman's face more often and more intently than anyone else's. Lately when I see pictures of her, it's like I don't even know who she is. I've seen her face so many times that looking at it, it becomes distorted, misshapen, unfamiliar. But now I'm back to her face being burned in my memory, restored and new. I had an amazing dream about Bette last night.

As you may have noticed from my last post, I'm pretty upset about her Vegas show not being extended. I was hoping that in the two years she was there, I was going to be able to make it out there to see her. I saved magazine and newspaper articles regarding the show, just so I could have plenty of material to make a Vegas scrapbook after my visit. However, as they tend to do, things just kept coming up financially that made me unable to save. Now, I did spend quite a bit of money going to see Fleetwood Mac this summer, but I was able to see them twice and take my Dad for the amount of money it would have cost me to see Bette once in Vegas. Plus I thought Bette would be in Vegas longer, so I was confident that I had time to save up. But now things are worse than they've ever been for me financially and she's leaving Vegas in two and a half months.

Anyway, back to the dream. I've had all this Vegas stuff on my mind, so last night I dreamed about it, or should I say this morning, technically. The dream was based on the fact that I wanted to go to Vegas but couldn't, so I needed to let Bette know how much I wanted to see her. I'm not really sure why I needed to tell her, but I did. She was doing some sort of promotional thing concerning the end of her Vegas run, and I just so happened to be in the vicinity. I decided I had to get there. I raced through this really elaborate building that was like part train station, part department store. The place was huge. After encountering all kinds of other things along the way, I finally got to the place where Bette was filming her promo. It must have been for some talk show or something. I managed to get down where she was and there was a producer or someone talking to her. I had two people with me. I think it was my mom and sister. Anyway, we just casually walked past where Bette was while this guy was talking. And I mean, we're six, seven feet from her chair. She acknowledged us walking past, and even called me by name. (Don't ask me how that happened.) As soon as we passed her, I decided this was my chance to say something to her. I apologized for interrupting and introduced myself. I told her how upset I was that she wasn't extending her Vegas show because it had been a dream of mine for some time to see her perform live and how I was afraid I was never going to get the chance now. I don't remember what she said to me or what I said after that, but I remember there were tears in my eyes because I was so thrilled to be talking to her. Then she embraced me, and I have never felt so happy and loved in all my life. And I do mean my real life, not my dream life. She held me for a long time, and I was crying from happiness, then I thanked her for speaking with me and told her that I wouldn't bother her any longer, and I walked away.

I don't know why this dream has affected me so deeply, but I felt like I connected with Bette, that I was a person and not just another nameless fan. The whole thing really made me feel at ease about not seeing Bette in Vegas, because it felt like a sign to me that everything is going to be okay and that my time will come someday. I know this all probably sounds really odd, but that was the best dream I have had in a very long time. Weird, like most of mine have been lately with my odd sleep patterns, but wonderful.

I'm off to update my iPod now.