Long time no see, Internets. How's it going? Oh, me? I'm doing okay. Obviously I have not stuck to writing as a creative outlet to make me forget about my miserable existence and general aimlessness. I know I said I was going to write more, but when I have a couch and episodes of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia calling my name, I tend to not be so productive any more.
I am on here to write today though, and to write about something I truly truly care about - Bette Midler. That's right, folks! It's movie review time!
I have known about Bette Midler's newest film Parental Guidance since it was in pre-production, so I have been anxiously waiting to see her onscreen again for quite some time. More than a year, as a matter of fact. My original plan, after finding out about Barbra Streisand's new one, The Guilt Trip, was to do a double feature on Christmas Day. My family from Texas decided to come in for the holidays, so that changed my plans a little bit. Yesterday, though, is going on the books as one of the greatest days in recent history for me. I did Parental Guidance at 7:35 and The Guilt Trip at 9:35, giving me just enough time to make a bathroom stop before the previews for the second film started. I was giddy, trying not to anxiously tap my feet or randomly shout out yips like an excited puppy. Maintaining my cool was difficult. (In fact, this whole year has been spectacular film-wise for me. Shirley MacLaine had Bernie, Meryl Streep had Hope Springs, and Susan Sarandon had a couple of supporting roles. Since all five of these women are my imaginary lovers - Streisand to a lesser degree than the others - I have been pretty stoked about cinema this year.) So, without further ado in regards to my...weirdness...I present you with my opinions on my Most Anticipated Films of 2012.
Billy Crystal is a funny guy that tries really, really hard to be funny. Sometimes too hard. That was obvious in Parental Guidance. Some of his jokes fell flat or felt awkwardly placed (no one always has a witty retort to lighten the mood during emotional times), and as someone who has tried for years to escape their family's obsession with baseball, the fact that Crystal's character was so wrapped up in the game sort of put me off. Marisa Tomei was great as the neurotic mom, and there was a really funny role-playing thing between her and Tom Everett Scott that contained just the right amount of weird to work. Bailee Madison is a pretty fantastic little actress and Kyle Breitkopf was utterly charming, even at his brattiest. Joshua Rush, as the middle grandchild, was all kinds of adorable, even with his obviously fake stuttering. Bette was severely underused. It was obvious her character was the knockabout, the one always either striving to please her daughter or struggling to get her husband to notice her. Other than the mention of her having been a weather girl when she was younger, you don't really learn much about her character. She had one scene where she cried (like you could keep me from crying while I'm watching her well up) and another where she sang (again, giddy here), and I thought she looked just great. I really enjoyed the movie and could have easily watched it twice back to back. My only complaints were really about the lack of good lines for Bette and the fact that the movie felt a little rushed. There was little room for character development, and too much focus on Crystal as the reluctant grandfather instead of focus on the grandmother who really wanted desperately to be more involved in her grandchildren's lives. But the movie had just the right amount of schmaltz to work for me, and I would definitely recommend it as a rainy day flick.
I could tell from the previews I was going to enjoy The Guilt Trip. I love Seth Rogen and everything that he does due to my crush on his 'fro. Right from the start, the movie had me laughing. The dialogue was genuinely funny, not just chuckle-worthy, and Rogen's character is so awkward that you can't help but grin as he fumbles to look like a respectable businessman. Streisand looks phenomenal, with just the right amount of frump thrown in to make you forget you're watching perfectionist and world-renowned singer and class act Barbra Streisand. Obviously, most of the film is devoted to mother-son bonding due to the road trip theme, but there is also a little time to show off Rogen's character as this brilliant scientist/inventor and develop a love interest storyline for Streisand. There is also one incredibly well-done scene where mother and son butt heads due to being completely fed up with one another. (The film's one use of the f-word gets to be utilized by Streisand, and it was AWESOME.) There's a sweet little twist near the end, and the movie leaves you feeling like both characters (fully developed, flawed characters) have grown due to their excursion. Personally, I could not get over how flawless Streisand looked. Her hips have widened and she's added a little weight with her age, but with her hooked nose and slightly crossed eyes, she is just perfectly imperfect. Her hair is softer around the edges, curving nicely toward her face versus the angular bob that has been her signature look for the past twenty years. Age has treated her very well, and the over-protective Jewish mother thing doesn't seem contrived with her. This movie was worth the 15-year wait since her last major role. Brava.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Pinterest Project: Muffins!
I love muffins of pretty much any kind. I had some bananas that were blackening rather rapidly, so I decided to hold on to them and find a banana muffin recipe. I looked at several recipes through Pinterest and pretty quickly I found one that seemed simple and didn't require a lot of work so I decided to go with that one.
Here's the recipe.
Unfortunately, I discovered after I already started to mix the ingredients that I had no flour or cinnamon. Fortunately, I live a quarter of a mile from Kroger, so I left the pre-heating oven on and covered my bowl so the cat wouldn't get into it, and went and picked up the remaining ingredients. Now, I tend to like my bananas a little riper than the next person. In fact, I have scolded co-workers upon finding perfectly good-looking bananas in the trash. So the fact that you are supposed to put fairly ripe bananas into banana bread recipes excited me just a little. I only had two bananas left from my recent grocery trip (prior to the emergency Kroger run), so I decided to halve the recipe so I wouldn't risk my muffins not being banana-y enough. That also kept me from eating a dozen muffins in three days. The other half banana I had left made for a nice little pre-baking snack.
Now, I also didn't have any nuts, so I decided to put a sweet little twist on my muffins. While they were still piping hot and just out of the oven, I melted a piece from a Hershey bar I had in my cabinet and drizzled it on the tops of the muffins. Mmmm. Nothing better than chocolate and banana, right?
Here's the recipe.
Unfortunately, I discovered after I already started to mix the ingredients that I had no flour or cinnamon. Fortunately, I live a quarter of a mile from Kroger, so I left the pre-heating oven on and covered my bowl so the cat wouldn't get into it, and went and picked up the remaining ingredients. Now, I tend to like my bananas a little riper than the next person. In fact, I have scolded co-workers upon finding perfectly good-looking bananas in the trash. So the fact that you are supposed to put fairly ripe bananas into banana bread recipes excited me just a little. I only had two bananas left from my recent grocery trip (prior to the emergency Kroger run), so I decided to halve the recipe so I wouldn't risk my muffins not being banana-y enough. That also kept me from eating a dozen muffins in three days. The other half banana I had left made for a nice little pre-baking snack.
Now, I also didn't have any nuts, so I decided to put a sweet little twist on my muffins. While they were still piping hot and just out of the oven, I melted a piece from a Hershey bar I had in my cabinet and drizzled it on the tops of the muffins. Mmmm. Nothing better than chocolate and banana, right?
I have to say, they were quite good. I may use this recipe more often. I mean, it's always nice when I don't make a complete mess or destroy a household appliance while cooking.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Pinterest Project: Epic Foodie Fail
Fall is here, which means all I want to do is cuddle up on the couch, drink hot tea, eat soup, and never leave my house. Out of all the soup recipes I have found on Pinterest lately, the one I thought sounded the simplest to prepare was a roasted cauliflower and white cheddar soup. The recipe I worked with can be found here.
I had to purchase most of the ingredients specifically for the soup, as I don't keep my pantry stocked for occasions like this at all. I went out of my way to travel to Whole Foods for the aged white cheddar (two different Krogers did not have ANY aged cheeses in their deli department). I bought bakery-prepared bread to dip in the soup. Prep started out pretty normal for me. I had slight difficulty with the onion chopping, as always, although I didn't tear up terribly bad. My house did smell like onions until I took out the trash a couple days later, and in fact my cutting board still reeks, but that will eventually dissipate. Also, when it came time to shred the cheese, I basically just had to shave it, as I do not own a grater and wasn't about to buy one just for one recipe.
Everything went fairly smoothly as I began cooking the soup mixture. It smelled amazing.
Now, this is where the project went wrong. I managed to pour the steaming hot soup into my blender without spilling much. Maybe I should have done this blender thing differently. After all, the recipe does mention something about a stick blender (I have no idea what that is.) I turned the blender on and immediately the lid buckled and some liquid escaped. Okay, no big deal. I turned off the blender and readjusted the lid and tried again, this time placing a towel over the lid to absorb any liquid that might get out. I turned the blender on and soup sprayed EVERYWHERE. It wasn't until the blender was off and I had lifted the towel that I realized why. The cap portion of the lid had fallen all the way through the center and into the blender. I unplugged the blender and poured everything back into the pot. This is what the cap looked like when I fished it out of the soup.
I went ahead and added the cheese and milk to the soup mixture and fished out the plastic I could find, but unfortunately, when I tried to eat a small bowl of the soup I still found several shavings. I decided it wasn't worth the digging and just tossed the soup after letting it cool. I was very disappointed in the inability of my blender (which I rarely use) to hold up under pressure. I have yet to decide whether I will try this recipe again. The most disappointing part of this whole thing was the money I spent on the cheese alone. I can always use cheese, I suppose. I just never thought I would spend so much money on a recipe only to have to throw it out. All the ingredients I had to purchase only came out to $7 or $8, but still, I might as well have eaten one meal out instead of pouring four servings worth of soup into the trash.
If you try this recipe, proceed with caution. Might I suggest a food processor for pureeing instead of a standard blender.
I had to purchase most of the ingredients specifically for the soup, as I don't keep my pantry stocked for occasions like this at all. I went out of my way to travel to Whole Foods for the aged white cheddar (two different Krogers did not have ANY aged cheeses in their deli department). I bought bakery-prepared bread to dip in the soup. Prep started out pretty normal for me. I had slight difficulty with the onion chopping, as always, although I didn't tear up terribly bad. My house did smell like onions until I took out the trash a couple days later, and in fact my cutting board still reeks, but that will eventually dissipate. Also, when it came time to shred the cheese, I basically just had to shave it, as I do not own a grater and wasn't about to buy one just for one recipe.
Everything went fairly smoothly as I began cooking the soup mixture. It smelled amazing.
Now, this is where the project went wrong. I managed to pour the steaming hot soup into my blender without spilling much. Maybe I should have done this blender thing differently. After all, the recipe does mention something about a stick blender (I have no idea what that is.) I turned the blender on and immediately the lid buckled and some liquid escaped. Okay, no big deal. I turned off the blender and readjusted the lid and tried again, this time placing a towel over the lid to absorb any liquid that might get out. I turned the blender on and soup sprayed EVERYWHERE. It wasn't until the blender was off and I had lifted the towel that I realized why. The cap portion of the lid had fallen all the way through the center and into the blender. I unplugged the blender and poured everything back into the pot. This is what the cap looked like when I fished it out of the soup.
I went ahead and added the cheese and milk to the soup mixture and fished out the plastic I could find, but unfortunately, when I tried to eat a small bowl of the soup I still found several shavings. I decided it wasn't worth the digging and just tossed the soup after letting it cool. I was very disappointed in the inability of my blender (which I rarely use) to hold up under pressure. I have yet to decide whether I will try this recipe again. The most disappointing part of this whole thing was the money I spent on the cheese alone. I can always use cheese, I suppose. I just never thought I would spend so much money on a recipe only to have to throw it out. All the ingredients I had to purchase only came out to $7 or $8, but still, I might as well have eaten one meal out instead of pouring four servings worth of soup into the trash.
If you try this recipe, proceed with caution. Might I suggest a food processor for pureeing instead of a standard blender.
Thursday, October 25, 2012
presented without comment
"Hello in There"
written and originally recorded by John Prine
We had an apartment in the city.
Me and my husband liked living there.
It's been years since the kids have grown,
a life of their own, left us alone.
John and Linda live in Omaha.
Joe is somewhere on the road.
We lost Davy in the Korean war.
I still don't know what for, don't matter any more.
You know that old trees just grow stronger,
and old rivers grow wilder every day,
but old people, they just grow lonesome
waiting for someone to say,
"Hello in there. Hello"
Me and my husband, we don't talk much anymore.
He sits and stares through the backdoor screen.
And all the news just repeats itself
like some forgotten dream
that we've both seen.
Someday I'll go and call up Judy.
We worked together at the factory.
Ah, but what would I say when she asks what's new?
Say, "Nothing, what's with you?
Nothing much to do."
You know that old trees just grow stronger,
and old rivers grow wilder every day,
ah, but, but old people, they just grow lonesome
waiting for someone to say,
"Hello in There. Hello."
So if you're walking down the street sometime
and you should spot some hollow ancient eyes,
don't you pass them by and stare
as if you didn't care.
Say, "Hello in there. Hello."
written and originally recorded by John Prine
We had an apartment in the city.
Me and my husband liked living there.
It's been years since the kids have grown,
a life of their own, left us alone.
John and Linda live in Omaha.
Joe is somewhere on the road.
We lost Davy in the Korean war.
I still don't know what for, don't matter any more.
You know that old trees just grow stronger,
and old rivers grow wilder every day,
but old people, they just grow lonesome
waiting for someone to say,
"Hello in there. Hello"
Me and my husband, we don't talk much anymore.
He sits and stares through the backdoor screen.
And all the news just repeats itself
like some forgotten dream
that we've both seen.
Someday I'll go and call up Judy.
We worked together at the factory.
Ah, but what would I say when she asks what's new?
Say, "Nothing, what's with you?
Nothing much to do."
You know that old trees just grow stronger,
and old rivers grow wilder every day,
ah, but, but old people, they just grow lonesome
waiting for someone to say,
"Hello in There. Hello."
So if you're walking down the street sometime
and you should spot some hollow ancient eyes,
don't you pass them by and stare
as if you didn't care.
Say, "Hello in there. Hello."
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Wow. I knew it had been a while since I posted, but I didn't realize it had been like six weeks.
I haven't been doing much writing lately, or working out, or experimenting with recipes from Pinterest. I haven't done a lot of anything at all, to be honest. My evenings are mostly spent lying on the couch in front of my TV after work. I had been feeling depressed and fat, and just generally unmotivated. I've also had some money stresses lately, so things have been very dull in my life. But I'm working on it. I've been trying to adjust my attitude at work. There have been a lot of changes that haven't necessarily been great, so I've been coping with that. I traded in my wrecked Corolla for a newer one, only to discover the registration on the original one had been cancelled and I owed $700 in taxes on it as well, since when I financed it back in the spring, the bank failed to tack on any sales tax. I was fit to be tied over that for several weeks, but it's basically all been straightened out at this point and I've managed to move on. I've been trying to get back into a workout routine again over the last two weeks, but with winter approaching, I question whether my motivation will hold up. This is how the slacking off started last winter. I just didn't want to leave my warm apartment to go exercise, so I stored up some fat over the winter and just never really got back into the habit.
The babies are turning one here soon, so I have birthday planning to look forward to, which will naturally be offset by the horror that is Christmas. But it will be fun, with them having their first real Christmas and watching them open gifts.
I want to say I'll try to blog more, but I don't want to do it without anything to say, so I'll save my next entry for something exciting, if anything exciting ever happens to me again.
I haven't been doing much writing lately, or working out, or experimenting with recipes from Pinterest. I haven't done a lot of anything at all, to be honest. My evenings are mostly spent lying on the couch in front of my TV after work. I had been feeling depressed and fat, and just generally unmotivated. I've also had some money stresses lately, so things have been very dull in my life. But I'm working on it. I've been trying to adjust my attitude at work. There have been a lot of changes that haven't necessarily been great, so I've been coping with that. I traded in my wrecked Corolla for a newer one, only to discover the registration on the original one had been cancelled and I owed $700 in taxes on it as well, since when I financed it back in the spring, the bank failed to tack on any sales tax. I was fit to be tied over that for several weeks, but it's basically all been straightened out at this point and I've managed to move on. I've been trying to get back into a workout routine again over the last two weeks, but with winter approaching, I question whether my motivation will hold up. This is how the slacking off started last winter. I just didn't want to leave my warm apartment to go exercise, so I stored up some fat over the winter and just never really got back into the habit.
The babies are turning one here soon, so I have birthday planning to look forward to, which will naturally be offset by the horror that is Christmas. But it will be fun, with them having their first real Christmas and watching them open gifts.
I want to say I'll try to blog more, but I don't want to do it without anything to say, so I'll save my next entry for something exciting, if anything exciting ever happens to me again.
Monday, September 3, 2012
Makeshift Foodie Project
This week I also decided to try to make some onion rings, as I had purchased an onion at the grocery for the pizza casserole but opted not to use it once I re-worked the recipe. I've used eggs in the past to help coat things, so I thought a little flour seasoned with salt and pepper would coat the onions sufficiently.
I hate cutting onions. I worked at a ballpark concession stand one summer and had to cut onions almost every day. I could never do it without my eyes burning immensely, so I thought this time I'd try some no-cry tips for cutting onions. I used the overhead fan on my oven, burned a candle next to the cutting board to help absorb some of the fumes, and I also rinsed the onion multiple times in hot water while slicing it. I did all this while breathing through my mouth instead of my nose. I still had some tears and burning in my eyes by the end, although it wasn't near the experience I usually have. I tried. The real problem I ran into was my laziness. I only wanted to have to put the rings in the oven one time, so I cooked multiple rings together until my tray was full. See?
This turned out to be not such a great idea. The rings in the center of larger rings didn't get brown enough, while the thinner ones were dangerously close to burning by the time I was done. I think I had the oven on 425 still, as I did these the same day I cooked the potato. I may have bumped it down to 400. Here's the finished product:
The onions themselves were done enough, so I had no problems there. However, I would not recommend coating with mere flour. All I could taste was onion and flour. They didn't have that great crispy taste that fried restaurant rings tend to have. They certainly weren't terrible, but they could have been far better. If I attempt this again, I will certainly try with a different coating or batter.
I hate cutting onions. I worked at a ballpark concession stand one summer and had to cut onions almost every day. I could never do it without my eyes burning immensely, so I thought this time I'd try some no-cry tips for cutting onions. I used the overhead fan on my oven, burned a candle next to the cutting board to help absorb some of the fumes, and I also rinsed the onion multiple times in hot water while slicing it. I did all this while breathing through my mouth instead of my nose. I still had some tears and burning in my eyes by the end, although it wasn't near the experience I usually have. I tried. The real problem I ran into was my laziness. I only wanted to have to put the rings in the oven one time, so I cooked multiple rings together until my tray was full. See?
This turned out to be not such a great idea. The rings in the center of larger rings didn't get brown enough, while the thinner ones were dangerously close to burning by the time I was done. I think I had the oven on 425 still, as I did these the same day I cooked the potato. I may have bumped it down to 400. Here's the finished product:
The onions themselves were done enough, so I had no problems there. However, I would not recommend coating with mere flour. All I could taste was onion and flour. They didn't have that great crispy taste that fried restaurant rings tend to have. They certainly weren't terrible, but they could have been far better. If I attempt this again, I will certainly try with a different coating or batter.
Pinterest Project: More Foodie Ventures
I mentioned my newfound fascination with Pinterest in my last post. I've found several recipes on there, but there are a lot I haven't tried due to the fact that I'm only one person, and cooking for one is a bitch. It's easy to make casseroles and large dishes, but I have to eat on them for so long that by the time I'm done, I am so sick of whatever I prepared that I won't eat it again for months. This happened last week with the dish I posted about, the pizza casserole. It was delicious, but by the second day of eating two meals worth of this, I was over it. Fortunately, I was able to share a serving with a friend of mine who thoroughly complimented me.
I also mentioned last time that I was looking for avocado recipes. I decided to go with an avocado-banana smoothie recipe that I found online. This was decent, but it was a little too thick and a little too heavy on the banana flavor for my taste, so I'm still looking to expand on this avocado trend.
One foodie project I tried this past week was one I had spotted a while ago but just hadn't attempted yet. Another was one I stumbled upon and tried almost immediately after discovering. The first was a twist on the baked potato. Here's the photo:
The instructions were to cut thin slices in a whole potato, almost all the way through but not quite. (As you can see, the one in the picture also contains chives.) Drizzle with olive oil, season with salt and pepper, sprinkle some parmesan on top, and bake at 425 for 45 minutes. I had a pretty simple time cutting through the potato.
I didn't have any parmesan, so I decided to use some shredded mozarella I had left over from the pizza casserole. Knowing how cheese behaves in the oven, I waited until the potato was almost done before throwing some mozarella on there. It still browned a little more than I intended, but it tasted fine. I didn't have to leave the potato in for but about 35 minutes. It came out like this:
The next thing I tried was a "mug cake", which in this instance was more like a mug cookie. It was ingredients for a single chocolate chip cookie dough cake mixed in a coffee mug and cooked in the microwave. It only took a minute, minute and a half and the clean-up was amazing.
Click here for the link. As you can see, I did not use chocolate chips, but I did have part of a dark chocolate bar on hand, so I broke that up into small pieces and used that instead of the chips.
Ta-da! All that was left was to top with a scoop of vanilla ice cream and I was good to go.
The first few bites while the cookie was still warm were quite delicious. I'm not sure if the ice cream softened it up or what, but once I got further down the cookie/cake was just too spongy and chewy for my taste, so I threw the rest of it out. But I was proud of myself for having the gumption to try something like this. And all in all, it was another successful foodie project - successful as in it didn't catch fire or taste like shit.
I also mentioned last time that I was looking for avocado recipes. I decided to go with an avocado-banana smoothie recipe that I found online. This was decent, but it was a little too thick and a little too heavy on the banana flavor for my taste, so I'm still looking to expand on this avocado trend.
One foodie project I tried this past week was one I had spotted a while ago but just hadn't attempted yet. Another was one I stumbled upon and tried almost immediately after discovering. The first was a twist on the baked potato. Here's the photo:
The instructions were to cut thin slices in a whole potato, almost all the way through but not quite. (As you can see, the one in the picture also contains chives.) Drizzle with olive oil, season with salt and pepper, sprinkle some parmesan on top, and bake at 425 for 45 minutes. I had a pretty simple time cutting through the potato.
I didn't have any parmesan, so I decided to use some shredded mozarella I had left over from the pizza casserole. Knowing how cheese behaves in the oven, I waited until the potato was almost done before throwing some mozarella on there. It still browned a little more than I intended, but it tasted fine. I didn't have to leave the potato in for but about 35 minutes. It came out like this:
The next thing I tried was a "mug cake", which in this instance was more like a mug cookie. It was ingredients for a single chocolate chip cookie dough cake mixed in a coffee mug and cooked in the microwave. It only took a minute, minute and a half and the clean-up was amazing.
Click here for the link. As you can see, I did not use chocolate chips, but I did have part of a dark chocolate bar on hand, so I broke that up into small pieces and used that instead of the chips.
Ta-da! All that was left was to top with a scoop of vanilla ice cream and I was good to go.
The first few bites while the cookie was still warm were quite delicious. I'm not sure if the ice cream softened it up or what, but once I got further down the cookie/cake was just too spongy and chewy for my taste, so I threw the rest of it out. But I was proud of myself for having the gumption to try something like this. And all in all, it was another successful foodie project - successful as in it didn't catch fire or taste like shit.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Pinterest Project: Casserole Success
I have become addicted to Pinterest, like many others that I know, but for me it's mainly because I like seeing what other people are into. If I happen to find something of interest to me, that's just an added bonus. I embarked on a bit of a home improvement project a little over a month ago and took some ideas from Pinterest. Some turned out (invisible bookshelves), others did not (dyeing mason jars). Now I'm focusing on recipes. Cooking for one gets a little mundane, as I tired easily of eating chicken and vegetables five or six days out of the week.
Sunday night I took a 3-Meat Pizza Casserole recipe and adapted it a little bit. Here's the original recipe.
It supposedly turned out like this:
Sunday night I took a 3-Meat Pizza Casserole recipe and adapted it a little bit. Here's the original recipe.
It supposedly turned out like this:
I did not use any meat aside from the pepperoni, and I also decided to forgo the vegetables as well. Not that I'm against vegetables. It's just that too much cheese, onions, and garlic together...let's just say it doesn't end well. So my "casserole" was more like baked pasta with pepperoni, but it is pretty delicious. Here's what mine turned out like:
I have eaten four meals out of this already, and still have probably two servings left. The only problem is that I have WAY more pepperoni than one person can ever need, so let's hope it's a while before that stuff goes bad, or I will be throwing like six bucks down the drain.
If anybody has any recipe suggestions, please send them my way. I'm currently trying to find something to do with an avocado, aside from just putting it in my salad.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Writing Update
I said I was going to make myself write, and I've really been doing it. I have about 5600 words - 10% of the way to an acceptable novel length! Woot! And I'm trying to look at the positives too, aren't you proud of me? 10% finished rather than 90% left to go. For some reason, the story that I have now is just flowing out of me like crazy. In fact, I've written a lot of it by hand and typed it up later after I got to a computer. I'm not ready to reveal any information, because the story is not cohesive at all yet. But I have a lot of it sort of mapped out in my head. I just have to get everything in the right order. Right now, the story consists of several vignettes that I will weave together once I get the main plot points written up. They say to write what you know, and I guess there's a part of me in each of my protagonists, but I think this time is a little different. My protagonist is female, but she's married, eventually with children, and she is all about being a housewife. I mean, she loves it. Probably part of me wants those things, but that life isn't what I know at all, so that's a step in the right direction, I think. Most of the time, my "heroines" are post-college moaners, but I feel like this time I've moved on to a character with a real problem, rather than one that goes through life all "woe is me" all the time.
I have trouble with linear thinking, so that's why I've ended up just working up the story in chunks. It allows me to get to the issues, and then I can add in the filler (description of appearances, locations, that sort of thing) later. Plus, that makes it easier when it comes time to decide if I'm having a straight beginning to end story, or if I want to work in flashbacks, or if it's going to be a story with the end as the beginning, and then going back and building up the backstory.
I know I'm not the kind of writer that's going to end up with a Pulitzer some day, but if I can churn out one decent story that people want to read, that would make me really happy.
I have trouble with linear thinking, so that's why I've ended up just working up the story in chunks. It allows me to get to the issues, and then I can add in the filler (description of appearances, locations, that sort of thing) later. Plus, that makes it easier when it comes time to decide if I'm having a straight beginning to end story, or if I want to work in flashbacks, or if it's going to be a story with the end as the beginning, and then going back and building up the backstory.
I know I'm not the kind of writer that's going to end up with a Pulitzer some day, but if I can churn out one decent story that people want to read, that would make me really happy.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Triple Feature Movie Review
With the recent re-emergence of Burns and Allen in my life, I decided to order myself an early birthday present and get some B&A merchandise I've had my eye on for quite some time. One of these is a triple feature DVD of Burns & Allen films. (If I could find all of their early film shorts on DVD, I think I would literally shit myself.) Since I've decided to write more, I will occasionally do book, movie, or album reviews here to build my repertoire. I used to do a weekly feature on a music forum I frequented, but I haven't been on there for years and I would love to start doing reviews again.
The first film on this triple feature DVD is a movie called Here Comes Cookie from 1935. Gracie plays the ditsy daughter of a very rich man who decides that in order to protect his fortune from a gold-digger that is courting his other daughter, he must sign his money over to Gracie. Mr. Allen agrees to let Phyllis marry this suitor if, with falsely generated word that Mr. Allen has gone broke, he sticks by her side despite Daddy no longer being a possible meal ticket. Things begin innocently enough, with Gracie deciding to assist with the homelessness problem in New York by offering free room and board to unemployed actors (who apparently consisted of the majority of the city's homeless population at the time). Gracie instructs the butler to start cutting up their clothes in order to make them look like vagrants. Hearing about the new financial arrangement, her sister Phyllis's beau decides to pursue Gracie, sending a fortune teller to set up their meeting by telling her when, where, and how she will meet the man of her dreams. Meanwhile, her father finally enjoying his retirement in North Carolina on mere pennies a day, until Phyllis arrives to reveal Gracie's inanities and urge him to return home. When they arrive, Gracie has had the home reconstructed into a theater to put on a show with her new actor friends, at the insistence of her new fiancé, who has concocted the theatrical production as a means of embezzling the money without having to actually marry either daughter. The play is a riotous disaster, and this leads to the swift but pleasant ending. The suitor and his accomplice get locked in the box office, while Gracie gets offered a job as a movie producer. Cops get thieving suitor; Pops gets his piece of mind back by getting his wacko daughter out of his hair. Cue credits.
The movie is full of Vaudeville acts, ones that are unrecognized today but I'm sure would have been known by audiences at the time. (Many of them go uncredited as well.) George Burns is on hand to be befuddled by Gracie's antics as her father's legal advisor. Gracie is a delight through and through. She's thin and bright-eyed, and you can't keep your eyes off of her. She's quite agile as well, performing a cute little Latin-inspired song and dance number during the show within a show. Her voice is airy and lilting, and she appears as light as air on her feet. The movie contains a few pratfalls as well. It's is entertaining but very brief, and it feels more like a showcase for Gracie's talents than a movie with an actual plotline.
Film number two is a road trip comedy called Six of a Kind, also starring Charlie Ruggles, Mary Boland, and W.C. Fields. The Whinneys are about to set off on a cross-country trip to celebrate their twentieth wedding anniversary. The wife decides to take out an ad in the paper offering to share the ride with another couple in an attempt to save money. George and Gracie answer the ad, much to the chagrin of the husband. They take off for California with Gracie's Great Dane in tow. Calamity ensues. The older couple's plans for a second honeymoon are further thwarted when, finding out George and Gracie aren't married, they don't even get to share a room together on their trip. In the meantime, a bank co-worker of Mr. Whinney's stays in hot pursuit of the foursome. It seems he decided to embezzle $50,000 from the bank and pin it on Whinney, thinking he could place the money in Whinney's suitcase and retrieve the money from them along the way. Finally catching up to them in Nevada, the embezzler gets caught by the local sheriff (Fields), who is tricked into thinking the embezzler is actually the embezzled. Detectives, who became aware of the Whinneys whereabouts when the couple ran out of cash and wired the bank for cash from the road, show up and the whole crazy scheme is revealed.
This film is another one with a speedy resolution, but the laughs along the way are worth it. Ruggles (who I instantly recognized) and Boland make a great little team, and the patter between George and Gracie is brilliant, as always. "You have an aunt that sees with her mouth?" "Yeah, she sees if her soup is cold." W.C. Fields doesn't show up until halfway through the movie, but he has a gut-busting scene involving a pool cue that he just can't seem to shoot straight. He also has a few funny zingers, including, "I'm as busy as a pickpocket at a nudist colony." This feature also has a nice special feature. It includes the original trailer!
The final movie in the set (Love in Bloom) features Dixie Lee (Mrs. Bing Crosby) and Joe Morrison in the lead roles. A young girl whose family are carnival people decides she's had enough and runs away. Starting over in the big city, she meets an aspiring songwriter. They both get a job working at a music store, where they fall in love and decide to get married. George plays Dixie's brother, who brings his wife Gracie along in search of little sis. Their alcoholic pop has landed himself in jail again, and they need sis to bail him out. Unfortunately, once he's out of jail, Dad's mission is to bring his beloved daughter back home. She refuses at first, but when her father inadvertently crashes the wrong wedding while stone-cold drunk, she decides to go with him to save herself from further embarrassment. As the carnival travels the world, our budding songwriter finally gets published. Dad decides to let his daughter have her freedom after all, after acquiring a new business partner from New York, which turns out to be our songwriter. He basically paid for his lover's "freedom", but hey, the young-in-love couple gets to be together in the end and that's all that matters.
During an early scene, Gracie sings a little number called "Here Comes Cookie" (seems misplaced, huh?) while George stuffs cotton in his ears. This is reminiscent of one of their later running gags on their radio show where George randomly breaks out in song with great protestation from everyone around him (except Gracie). Aside from this, Gracie and George are onscreen for less than 1/3 of the movie. Lee and Morrison are decent enough actors and both have pleasant singing voices. On its own, the movie is fairly good, but the billing is misleading as this is not a Burns-Allen vehicle. Enjoyable enough, though.
For all three films, I'd give four out of five stars. One succeeds where the others fail, and for me, the presence of Burns & Allen made it worth the price of the disc.
The first film on this triple feature DVD is a movie called Here Comes Cookie from 1935. Gracie plays the ditsy daughter of a very rich man who decides that in order to protect his fortune from a gold-digger that is courting his other daughter, he must sign his money over to Gracie. Mr. Allen agrees to let Phyllis marry this suitor if, with falsely generated word that Mr. Allen has gone broke, he sticks by her side despite Daddy no longer being a possible meal ticket. Things begin innocently enough, with Gracie deciding to assist with the homelessness problem in New York by offering free room and board to unemployed actors (who apparently consisted of the majority of the city's homeless population at the time). Gracie instructs the butler to start cutting up their clothes in order to make them look like vagrants. Hearing about the new financial arrangement, her sister Phyllis's beau decides to pursue Gracie, sending a fortune teller to set up their meeting by telling her when, where, and how she will meet the man of her dreams. Meanwhile, her father finally enjoying his retirement in North Carolina on mere pennies a day, until Phyllis arrives to reveal Gracie's inanities and urge him to return home. When they arrive, Gracie has had the home reconstructed into a theater to put on a show with her new actor friends, at the insistence of her new fiancé, who has concocted the theatrical production as a means of embezzling the money without having to actually marry either daughter. The play is a riotous disaster, and this leads to the swift but pleasant ending. The suitor and his accomplice get locked in the box office, while Gracie gets offered a job as a movie producer. Cops get thieving suitor; Pops gets his piece of mind back by getting his wacko daughter out of his hair. Cue credits.
The movie is full of Vaudeville acts, ones that are unrecognized today but I'm sure would have been known by audiences at the time. (Many of them go uncredited as well.) George Burns is on hand to be befuddled by Gracie's antics as her father's legal advisor. Gracie is a delight through and through. She's thin and bright-eyed, and you can't keep your eyes off of her. She's quite agile as well, performing a cute little Latin-inspired song and dance number during the show within a show. Her voice is airy and lilting, and she appears as light as air on her feet. The movie contains a few pratfalls as well. It's is entertaining but very brief, and it feels more like a showcase for Gracie's talents than a movie with an actual plotline.
Film number two is a road trip comedy called Six of a Kind, also starring Charlie Ruggles, Mary Boland, and W.C. Fields. The Whinneys are about to set off on a cross-country trip to celebrate their twentieth wedding anniversary. The wife decides to take out an ad in the paper offering to share the ride with another couple in an attempt to save money. George and Gracie answer the ad, much to the chagrin of the husband. They take off for California with Gracie's Great Dane in tow. Calamity ensues. The older couple's plans for a second honeymoon are further thwarted when, finding out George and Gracie aren't married, they don't even get to share a room together on their trip. In the meantime, a bank co-worker of Mr. Whinney's stays in hot pursuit of the foursome. It seems he decided to embezzle $50,000 from the bank and pin it on Whinney, thinking he could place the money in Whinney's suitcase and retrieve the money from them along the way. Finally catching up to them in Nevada, the embezzler gets caught by the local sheriff (Fields), who is tricked into thinking the embezzler is actually the embezzled. Detectives, who became aware of the Whinneys whereabouts when the couple ran out of cash and wired the bank for cash from the road, show up and the whole crazy scheme is revealed.
This film is another one with a speedy resolution, but the laughs along the way are worth it. Ruggles (who I instantly recognized) and Boland make a great little team, and the patter between George and Gracie is brilliant, as always. "You have an aunt that sees with her mouth?" "Yeah, she sees if her soup is cold." W.C. Fields doesn't show up until halfway through the movie, but he has a gut-busting scene involving a pool cue that he just can't seem to shoot straight. He also has a few funny zingers, including, "I'm as busy as a pickpocket at a nudist colony." This feature also has a nice special feature. It includes the original trailer!
The final movie in the set (Love in Bloom) features Dixie Lee (Mrs. Bing Crosby) and Joe Morrison in the lead roles. A young girl whose family are carnival people decides she's had enough and runs away. Starting over in the big city, she meets an aspiring songwriter. They both get a job working at a music store, where they fall in love and decide to get married. George plays Dixie's brother, who brings his wife Gracie along in search of little sis. Their alcoholic pop has landed himself in jail again, and they need sis to bail him out. Unfortunately, once he's out of jail, Dad's mission is to bring his beloved daughter back home. She refuses at first, but when her father inadvertently crashes the wrong wedding while stone-cold drunk, she decides to go with him to save herself from further embarrassment. As the carnival travels the world, our budding songwriter finally gets published. Dad decides to let his daughter have her freedom after all, after acquiring a new business partner from New York, which turns out to be our songwriter. He basically paid for his lover's "freedom", but hey, the young-in-love couple gets to be together in the end and that's all that matters.
During an early scene, Gracie sings a little number called "Here Comes Cookie" (seems misplaced, huh?) while George stuffs cotton in his ears. This is reminiscent of one of their later running gags on their radio show where George randomly breaks out in song with great protestation from everyone around him (except Gracie). Aside from this, Gracie and George are onscreen for less than 1/3 of the movie. Lee and Morrison are decent enough actors and both have pleasant singing voices. On its own, the movie is fairly good, but the billing is misleading as this is not a Burns-Allen vehicle. Enjoyable enough, though.
For all three films, I'd give four out of five stars. One succeeds where the others fail, and for me, the presence of Burns & Allen made it worth the price of the disc.
Friday, August 3, 2012
This is me.
Many people would say that the end of the world is near. There are too many abominations, too many sins, for our world to survive much longer. Christians like to quote the book of Revelation to support this. But as someone who is constantly questioning the meaning of her existence, I think that our world is slowly making baby steps toward having the Promised Land right here on Earth. The oppressions that have existed for decades or even centuries feel like they are slowly being lifted.
For much of my life, I have felt like an outcast. There were times in my life when I was bullied by classmates for not being like them. The effect that had on my self-esteem has been incredibly difficult to overcome. In fact, it's something I still grapple with. I realize that the oppression I feel because of merely being different does not even come close to what gays or non-whites feel on a daily basis. Recently I have been doing a lot of thinking about this. I have spent much effort for most of my life concealing part of who I am to avoid judgment. It's tiring, constantly guarding what you say or do in front of certain people, all because you're afraid of what they might think. How much harder can someone make your life than you already are yourself just by being secretive? And how much affect do you have on the every day lives of other people that it necessitates your being so concerned about their opinions?
People's true colors come to light when scandal arises. The recent hoopla around Chick-fil-A has proven that. On Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day, my Facebook news feed blew up with posts about people being so proud to support Chick-fil-A, or about how they would never eat there again because of the company's blatant anti-gay stance. Since when does the food we put in our bellies show our allegiance to political or social causes?
If you ever read my blog, you may or may not know anything about me. Even though this blog is about my feelings, I am not always totally open. In fact, I have realized recently that there are only two people in this world that I feel TRULY know me, 100%, and this makes me really sad. What is so bad about myself that I am afraid to be fully me? And if I feel this bottled up, how does someone gay and closeted even make it through the day?
Let me be blunt then. Here are some things about me: I curse like a sailor. I drink alcohol often. I've had the dreaded pre-marital sex. I support gay rights. I believe that abortion should be a woman's choice. I believe that people's religious beliefs and sexual orientation are not anybody's else's business. I believe that churches should not interfere with federal or state laws. I believe that marijuana should be legalized. I believe that it's acceptable to live with someone without being married. I am afraid of dying. I hate going to church because I feel like the people there are trying to suffocate me. I think that people who interpret the Bible literally are idiots. I will never be happy because my life will never be good enough for me. I thank God every day that I left my hometown, because as unhappy as I can still be living where I am now, if I had stayed I wouldn't have survived. I'm still not sure if I believe in God. The times I feel most alive are when I'm driving in my car singing at the top of my lungs. I hate being around my extended family, because none of them know anything about me, and they would hate me if they did. My mother buys me Christian literature that I never even open. I want to be famous because I want people to remember me; I don't want to be one of those people that fades out of existence. I hate when people ask me if I've "met any nice boys" or if I "have a sweetheart"; I'm in my late twenties and this isn't 1953, just ask me if I'm fucking anybody. I don't like dogs because they're needy. If the draft is ever reinstated and women are eligible, I will go get pregnant just to dodge the draft. I literally go pscyho when I'm on my period, and I wonder if I'm clinically depressed.
If you want to know anything else, ask. I'm ready to be an open book, and I don't give a shit who reads it.
For much of my life, I have felt like an outcast. There were times in my life when I was bullied by classmates for not being like them. The effect that had on my self-esteem has been incredibly difficult to overcome. In fact, it's something I still grapple with. I realize that the oppression I feel because of merely being different does not even come close to what gays or non-whites feel on a daily basis. Recently I have been doing a lot of thinking about this. I have spent much effort for most of my life concealing part of who I am to avoid judgment. It's tiring, constantly guarding what you say or do in front of certain people, all because you're afraid of what they might think. How much harder can someone make your life than you already are yourself just by being secretive? And how much affect do you have on the every day lives of other people that it necessitates your being so concerned about their opinions?
People's true colors come to light when scandal arises. The recent hoopla around Chick-fil-A has proven that. On Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day, my Facebook news feed blew up with posts about people being so proud to support Chick-fil-A, or about how they would never eat there again because of the company's blatant anti-gay stance. Since when does the food we put in our bellies show our allegiance to political or social causes?
If you ever read my blog, you may or may not know anything about me. Even though this blog is about my feelings, I am not always totally open. In fact, I have realized recently that there are only two people in this world that I feel TRULY know me, 100%, and this makes me really sad. What is so bad about myself that I am afraid to be fully me? And if I feel this bottled up, how does someone gay and closeted even make it through the day?
Let me be blunt then. Here are some things about me: I curse like a sailor. I drink alcohol often. I've had the dreaded pre-marital sex. I support gay rights. I believe that abortion should be a woman's choice. I believe that people's religious beliefs and sexual orientation are not anybody's else's business. I believe that churches should not interfere with federal or state laws. I believe that marijuana should be legalized. I believe that it's acceptable to live with someone without being married. I am afraid of dying. I hate going to church because I feel like the people there are trying to suffocate me. I think that people who interpret the Bible literally are idiots. I will never be happy because my life will never be good enough for me. I thank God every day that I left my hometown, because as unhappy as I can still be living where I am now, if I had stayed I wouldn't have survived. I'm still not sure if I believe in God. The times I feel most alive are when I'm driving in my car singing at the top of my lungs. I hate being around my extended family, because none of them know anything about me, and they would hate me if they did. My mother buys me Christian literature that I never even open. I want to be famous because I want people to remember me; I don't want to be one of those people that fades out of existence. I hate when people ask me if I've "met any nice boys" or if I "have a sweetheart"; I'm in my late twenties and this isn't 1953, just ask me if I'm fucking anybody. I don't like dogs because they're needy. If the draft is ever reinstated and women are eligible, I will go get pregnant just to dodge the draft. I literally go pscyho when I'm on my period, and I wonder if I'm clinically depressed.
If you want to know anything else, ask. I'm ready to be an open book, and I don't give a shit who reads it.
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Tomorrow may be even brighter than today.
Wow, I have been writing less and less, haven't I? Well, to be honest, there hasn't been much to write about. For a while now, I've felt like I'm just existing. The only purpose to my life has been earning money to pay off my debts, and I can't get that done quickly enough to suit me. I am loathe to think that this is what the rest of my life will be like: being a workhorse with no greater purpose. I pour out love quite abundantly and give so much of myself to things that don't even matter. In return, I feel I get nothing but worry and stress. I am far too young to think of my life as going nowhere, but that is precisely how I feel.
I do have something to write about today, though. When I was a senior in high school, I became interested in George Burns and Gracie Allen, partly thanks to reading this book penned by George called "Gracie: A Love Story". Thanks to purchasing an antenna (after four years without cable or internet) and picking up a classics channel, I have rediscovered Burns & Allen. Obviously, I didn't forget them. Who could? But this station brought them to the forefront of my mind, and I have been brought such happiness because of this.
George and Gracie were beautiful, talented people, but the reason I love them so much is because they so loved each other. I always have these running fantasies about couples. I ask, "What if Lucy and Desi's relationship wasn't so volatile and they had stayed together?" "Lindsey and Stevie still love each other. They should be together." George and Gracie though, they stayed together. In fact, George never remarried after Gracie died. And one of the best parts for me? In the aforementioned book, he states that the first night he made love to Gracie was the best night of his life. He actually changed "had sex" to "made love" to more accurately describe it. He was about 90 when he wrote this. Over 20 years after her death, and he still remembered that night. God. Isn't that one of the most romantic things you've ever heard? They were so amazing.
I am being a total geek over this. It's sad.
I do have something to write about today, though. When I was a senior in high school, I became interested in George Burns and Gracie Allen, partly thanks to reading this book penned by George called "Gracie: A Love Story". Thanks to purchasing an antenna (after four years without cable or internet) and picking up a classics channel, I have rediscovered Burns & Allen. Obviously, I didn't forget them. Who could? But this station brought them to the forefront of my mind, and I have been brought such happiness because of this.
George and Gracie were beautiful, talented people, but the reason I love them so much is because they so loved each other. I always have these running fantasies about couples. I ask, "What if Lucy and Desi's relationship wasn't so volatile and they had stayed together?" "Lindsey and Stevie still love each other. They should be together." George and Gracie though, they stayed together. In fact, George never remarried after Gracie died. And one of the best parts for me? In the aforementioned book, he states that the first night he made love to Gracie was the best night of his life. He actually changed "had sex" to "made love" to more accurately describe it. He was about 90 when he wrote this. Over 20 years after her death, and he still remembered that night. God. Isn't that one of the most romantic things you've ever heard? They were so amazing.
I am being a total geek over this. It's sad.
Saturday, June 9, 2012
pointless
Life is nothing but a whole lot of crap that we are forced to deal with or endure, sprinkled by a few fleeting moments of enjoyment. To top it all off, we suffer through all that we do only to watch our bodies deteriorate and rot in front of our very eyes. And all for some reward on the other side? No thanks. I'll pass.
Friday, April 27, 2012
To write or not to write...
Is the blog a dying art form?
I mean, I realize how silly that sounds. Blog. Art form. Dying. Those words in a sentence are almost laughable. But yet, it seems to be true. I chastise myself frequently for not writing enough. The bloggers I follow haven't posted in six months. Everyone is worried about copyright and getting ripped off. The internet has opened up so many possibilities that we now fight over whose possibilities are more valuable. What is writing coming to?
Okay, maybe I'm giving myself too much credit here. I am putting pen to paper (figuratively, natch), but is blogging writing? I suppose to some it is. But what I do is just put my thoughts down. Who wants to read this drivel? If I were really creatively writing, no one would read that either. So what does it matter how valid my writing is?
I started a new Twitter account, hoping that limiting myself to 140 characters would not only challenge me, but also keep me from being so challenged I can't come up with anything funny. 140 characters is just enough for a good joke, one that doesn't require a ton of setup before the punchline. I think this may be good for me. I'm gaining followers slowly, but Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither were the comedy dynasties like Saturday Night Live or Second City, etc etc.
If you want to read my lame quips, the new account is @40sgrlprobs. Check it out.
I mean, I realize how silly that sounds. Blog. Art form. Dying. Those words in a sentence are almost laughable. But yet, it seems to be true. I chastise myself frequently for not writing enough. The bloggers I follow haven't posted in six months. Everyone is worried about copyright and getting ripped off. The internet has opened up so many possibilities that we now fight over whose possibilities are more valuable. What is writing coming to?
Okay, maybe I'm giving myself too much credit here. I am putting pen to paper (figuratively, natch), but is blogging writing? I suppose to some it is. But what I do is just put my thoughts down. Who wants to read this drivel? If I were really creatively writing, no one would read that either. So what does it matter how valid my writing is?
I started a new Twitter account, hoping that limiting myself to 140 characters would not only challenge me, but also keep me from being so challenged I can't come up with anything funny. 140 characters is just enough for a good joke, one that doesn't require a ton of setup before the punchline. I think this may be good for me. I'm gaining followers slowly, but Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither were the comedy dynasties like Saturday Night Live or Second City, etc etc.
If you want to read my lame quips, the new account is @40sgrlprobs. Check it out.
Monday, April 16, 2012
I go through spells where I just hate getting up and going to work in the mornings. Lately, this spell has been coupled with another: I don't want to be at home.
Maybe it's that spring is in the air and that makes me want to get out and about, but the more likely reason is that I am so sick of trying to amuse myself. I'm probably suffering from depression. I do seem to feel discontent a lot of the time. Is it something wrong with me though, or just wrong with my situation? I lack motivation to do much of anything. I don't feel like working out, I don't feel like going anywhere, I don't feel like writing. I don't feel like laying on the couch either, but that's what I end up doing because there's nothing else I'd rather do either. I don't know what to do. I need some sort of pick-me-up. But where do I find it?
Maybe it's that spring is in the air and that makes me want to get out and about, but the more likely reason is that I am so sick of trying to amuse myself. I'm probably suffering from depression. I do seem to feel discontent a lot of the time. Is it something wrong with me though, or just wrong with my situation? I lack motivation to do much of anything. I don't feel like working out, I don't feel like going anywhere, I don't feel like writing. I don't feel like laying on the couch either, but that's what I end up doing because there's nothing else I'd rather do either. I don't know what to do. I need some sort of pick-me-up. But where do I find it?
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Existential?
Why are there so many rules?
Why is there a certain order of things you're supposed to accomplish in your life? And why do people think you're a failure if you never cross one of those threshholds? We used to be just a bunch of cavemen running around. There were no gun laws that didn't get followed, no standards and practices, no credit score determining your value. We bought and traded with tools and food and other goods. Can't we just all loosen up? I'm not saying I want to go back to that. I'm not about to try and start eating raw meat and killing my own food. I just wish there weren't so many expectations. Must I go live on some hippie commune to get a break? *sigh*
Why is there a certain order of things you're supposed to accomplish in your life? And why do people think you're a failure if you never cross one of those threshholds? We used to be just a bunch of cavemen running around. There were no gun laws that didn't get followed, no standards and practices, no credit score determining your value. We bought and traded with tools and food and other goods. Can't we just all loosen up? I'm not saying I want to go back to that. I'm not about to try and start eating raw meat and killing my own food. I just wish there weren't so many expectations. Must I go live on some hippie commune to get a break? *sigh*
Monday, April 2, 2012
I hate, loathe, despise, and abominate sports.
Kentucky has been in the news recently thanks to the NCAA tournament, and in particular, the Final Four game against our rivals the Louisville Cardinals. Living in Lexington through all this has been a nightmare. It's bad enough whenever our team just has a mediocre season. Basketball consumes people's lives in this town like you wouldn't believe. But whenever we get this far in the tournament, people act absolutely crazy. There were literally riots in the streets because we won a basketball game Saturday. Riots! It makes our whole state look like flaming idiots!
Maybe I'm prejudiced. I've held a grudge against organized sports most of my life. I mean, I played organized sports for a long time. I enjoyed them. Basketball and softball both. But coaches got frustrated when you didn't want to put in extra practices in your spare time. I'm sorry. Was I not allowed to have other hobbies? Some of the people I played for were even family members. My parents, as my softball coaches, thought I was lazy. I played softball for fun, but my interests were elsewhere. My uncle, as my basketball coach, didn't want to seem like he was showing nepotism, so instead he purposely benched me. I'm not deluded enough to think I was great at either sport, but I was always better than someone on the team.
I've played sports and I've been around people coaching them my entire life. What I don't like about organized sports is the way they rule people's lives. When you have to put your family second for "the game", or when you missed out on other events because you were tied down to a sports team, what are you really gaining? There have been so many times when my relatives have missed birthdays and non-sport events (concerts, etc.) because of having a game to play/attend. My mother is totally supportive of her niece and nephews and have always tried to attend as many of their extra cirriculars as possible. But have her brothers shown her own children the same courtesy? No. I have been looked over my entire life in favor of a baseball game, and I am so tired of being surrounded by people who put sports above everything in their lives. It's sickening.
So, in other words, I will be so glad when this championship game is over and I can spend at least a few weeks not hearing about basketball every waking moment.
Maybe I'm prejudiced. I've held a grudge against organized sports most of my life. I mean, I played organized sports for a long time. I enjoyed them. Basketball and softball both. But coaches got frustrated when you didn't want to put in extra practices in your spare time. I'm sorry. Was I not allowed to have other hobbies? Some of the people I played for were even family members. My parents, as my softball coaches, thought I was lazy. I played softball for fun, but my interests were elsewhere. My uncle, as my basketball coach, didn't want to seem like he was showing nepotism, so instead he purposely benched me. I'm not deluded enough to think I was great at either sport, but I was always better than someone on the team.
I've played sports and I've been around people coaching them my entire life. What I don't like about organized sports is the way they rule people's lives. When you have to put your family second for "the game", or when you missed out on other events because you were tied down to a sports team, what are you really gaining? There have been so many times when my relatives have missed birthdays and non-sport events (concerts, etc.) because of having a game to play/attend. My mother is totally supportive of her niece and nephews and have always tried to attend as many of their extra cirriculars as possible. But have her brothers shown her own children the same courtesy? No. I have been looked over my entire life in favor of a baseball game, and I am so tired of being surrounded by people who put sports above everything in their lives. It's sickening.
So, in other words, I will be so glad when this championship game is over and I can spend at least a few weeks not hearing about basketball every waking moment.
Saturday, March 17, 2012
In praise of Michelle Williams.
I didn't get a chance to watch very many of this year's Oscar-nominated films before the awards ceremony. Last year, I made a point to watch as many Best Picture nominees as possible. I didn't get around to all of them, but I did see over half. This year, I only saw one. (Although I did get to see the film that housed Meryl Streep's winning performance.) Anyway, this week I saw My Week with Marilyn.
I was a little skeptical, just because the Marilyn biopic has been done so many times before in varying forms. The movie itself was not very impressive. The story had a few holes, and there was very little setup of the plot in the beginning. You're given a portrait of Marilyn that only extends over a very brief period of time, and there are characters whose opinions of Marilyn seem to have no basis, or are contradicting throughout the film. However, the saving grace of the movie is Michelle Williams. She embodied Marilyn in a way that I have never seen. The physical resemblance is minimal, but she felt Marilyn. It was obvious in the way that she moved, the way that she laughed, the way that she batted her eyes at men.
Many people will not know what is meant by this, but Michelle Williams was to Marilyn Monroe what Judy Davis was to Judy Garland. This is an incredibly high compliment to be paid, as I feel Judy Davis became Judy Garland when she portrayed her a decade ago. Both of these women, if only momentarily, make you forget you are not watching the true Hollywood star on screen. If not for the fact that Meryl Streep was PHENOMENAL in The Iron Lady, I would gladly put the words "Oscar winner" in front of Michelle Williams name on any possible occasion.
Isn't it amazing how Michelle Williams ended up being the best thing to come out of Dawson's Creek?
I was a little skeptical, just because the Marilyn biopic has been done so many times before in varying forms. The movie itself was not very impressive. The story had a few holes, and there was very little setup of the plot in the beginning. You're given a portrait of Marilyn that only extends over a very brief period of time, and there are characters whose opinions of Marilyn seem to have no basis, or are contradicting throughout the film. However, the saving grace of the movie is Michelle Williams. She embodied Marilyn in a way that I have never seen. The physical resemblance is minimal, but she felt Marilyn. It was obvious in the way that she moved, the way that she laughed, the way that she batted her eyes at men.
Many people will not know what is meant by this, but Michelle Williams was to Marilyn Monroe what Judy Davis was to Judy Garland. This is an incredibly high compliment to be paid, as I feel Judy Davis became Judy Garland when she portrayed her a decade ago. Both of these women, if only momentarily, make you forget you are not watching the true Hollywood star on screen. If not for the fact that Meryl Streep was PHENOMENAL in The Iron Lady, I would gladly put the words "Oscar winner" in front of Michelle Williams name on any possible occasion.
Isn't it amazing how Michelle Williams ended up being the best thing to come out of Dawson's Creek?
Monday, February 27, 2012
Yay Meryl!
I am so frigging proud and happy for Meryl Streep's Oscar win last night. While she may be the most nominated actor in history, she has only won three statuettes. The last one was 29 years ago, making last night her only win in my lifetime. While a tie with Viola Davis would have been spectacular, I am just elated right now. Meryl's portrayal of Margaret Thatcher was phenomenal, and she has deserved another win for a long time.
That's really the only comment I have on the awards, as this upset at the end of the night had me floored.
That's really the only comment I have on the awards, as this upset at the end of the night had me floored.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Goodbye, Whitney Elizabeth.
When I was about thirteen or fourteen years old, I was a huge Whitney Houston fan. I was a member of her fan club for a year after My Love is Your Love came out, and even through all of her struggles personally, I was able to enjoy her body of work without letting the bad parts of her cloud that original image in my mind.
I follow the celebrity world so closely that I did not find out as early as some people about her death. I've been so busy, and the day it happened I had been helping my sister and her family move into a new apartment. I had to take something over to my aunt and uncle's house that evening, and their big screen is visible from the front door. So as soon as I open the door, before I even say hello, I see on CNN "Whitney Houston 1963-2012" and I felt my heart fall into my stomach. I have so many memories that are tied in closely with celebrity events that there are not a lot of them I remember vividly. I do remember the exact moment I found out John Ritter died and the exact moment I found out Rue McClanahan died, and I'm sure this memory of Whitney's death will always stick out in my mind as well. Even three days later, I cannot get Whitney out of my head.
In middle and high school, before I got into Stevie Nicks, I had seven women that I adored. Of course Bette and Meryl were two of them; there was also Susan Sarandon, Shirley MacLaine, Mimi Rogers, Joan Cusack, and Whitney. I doodled their names like a little schoolgirl and was always coming up with different ways to arrange their initials to make some sort of anagram to discreetly put their names on my notebooks without seeming like a total weirdo. I felt a connection to Whitney because our birthdays were just a few days apart and because we had the same middle name. To me, she was THE voice. I mean, don't get me wrong. I adore Bette, but for actual vocal ability, Whitney blew everyone else out of the water. Such talent, such control. No one else will ever touch her in my mind.
So today I'm listening to Whitney, remembering what she meant to me, and remembering what a fantastic spirit she had before her life was taken over by drugs. As corny as it is, and as many people as have already said this, I will always love you, Whitney.
I follow the celebrity world so closely that I did not find out as early as some people about her death. I've been so busy, and the day it happened I had been helping my sister and her family move into a new apartment. I had to take something over to my aunt and uncle's house that evening, and their big screen is visible from the front door. So as soon as I open the door, before I even say hello, I see on CNN "Whitney Houston 1963-2012" and I felt my heart fall into my stomach. I have so many memories that are tied in closely with celebrity events that there are not a lot of them I remember vividly. I do remember the exact moment I found out John Ritter died and the exact moment I found out Rue McClanahan died, and I'm sure this memory of Whitney's death will always stick out in my mind as well. Even three days later, I cannot get Whitney out of my head.
In middle and high school, before I got into Stevie Nicks, I had seven women that I adored. Of course Bette and Meryl were two of them; there was also Susan Sarandon, Shirley MacLaine, Mimi Rogers, Joan Cusack, and Whitney. I doodled their names like a little schoolgirl and was always coming up with different ways to arrange their initials to make some sort of anagram to discreetly put their names on my notebooks without seeming like a total weirdo. I felt a connection to Whitney because our birthdays were just a few days apart and because we had the same middle name. To me, she was THE voice. I mean, don't get me wrong. I adore Bette, but for actual vocal ability, Whitney blew everyone else out of the water. Such talent, such control. No one else will ever touch her in my mind.
So today I'm listening to Whitney, remembering what she meant to me, and remembering what a fantastic spirit she had before her life was taken over by drugs. As corny as it is, and as many people as have already said this, I will always love you, Whitney.
Monday, January 16, 2012
I'd like to thank the Academy.
You are not going to believe this, but I did not watch the Golden Globes this year.
I used to follow the Hollywood awards season like nobody's business. I would watch the E! pre-shows all day leading up to the awards ceremonies. The Golden Globes and Oscars especially, but often the Emmys and Grammys as well. (Never got into the Tonys, as I was not very familiar with current Broadway plays, and still don't stay terribly well-informed.) But being without cable has really messed with my awards traditions. In fact, I was unsure of how I was going to watch the Globes anyway, but I forgot about them until about an hour in and by that point it seemed irrelevant. I mean, the whole reason for watching is to see the gowns, right?
Being as how at this point in my life I have basically given up on any dreams I ever had of being famous/semi-famous, I suppose now is as good a time as any to compose my useless Academy Award acceptance speech.
"Wow. I know people say all the time that they have dreamt of this moment since they were a kid, but I really have. I really have, I swear. Ask my mom and she'll tell you. I'll give you her phone number after the show. You can find me in the bathroom. I'm talking to you, Clooney.
Wow, okay, focus. I have to thank my family, especially my parents, who have done a lot to help me out over the years. I have to credit the love of my life, Bette Midler, who has made me want to be a better, more talented person. Thanks to my co-stars, director, and all the writers involved with *insert project name here*. Thanks to the Academy. Most importantly, I have to thank myself, without whom none of this would be possible. I have been my rock and my inspiration for so many years. Thanks, me! Oh, and thanks to Streep for not being nominated this year! Goodnight!"
I used to follow the Hollywood awards season like nobody's business. I would watch the E! pre-shows all day leading up to the awards ceremonies. The Golden Globes and Oscars especially, but often the Emmys and Grammys as well. (Never got into the Tonys, as I was not very familiar with current Broadway plays, and still don't stay terribly well-informed.) But being without cable has really messed with my awards traditions. In fact, I was unsure of how I was going to watch the Globes anyway, but I forgot about them until about an hour in and by that point it seemed irrelevant. I mean, the whole reason for watching is to see the gowns, right?
Being as how at this point in my life I have basically given up on any dreams I ever had of being famous/semi-famous, I suppose now is as good a time as any to compose my useless Academy Award acceptance speech.
"Wow. I know people say all the time that they have dreamt of this moment since they were a kid, but I really have. I really have, I swear. Ask my mom and she'll tell you. I'll give you her phone number after the show. You can find me in the bathroom. I'm talking to you, Clooney.
Wow, okay, focus. I have to thank my family, especially my parents, who have done a lot to help me out over the years. I have to credit the love of my life, Bette Midler, who has made me want to be a better, more talented person. Thanks to my co-stars, director, and all the writers involved with *insert project name here*. Thanks to the Academy. Most importantly, I have to thank myself, without whom none of this would be possible. I have been my rock and my inspiration for so many years. Thanks, me! Oh, and thanks to Streep for not being nominated this year! Goodnight!"
Long time. Long time no see, huh?
I felt bad for slacking on my posts, until I logged onto Blogger to see that none of the blogs I currently follow have been updated in at least two months. Glad to see I'm not the only lazy DOB out there. (DOB - daughter of a bitch)
I have been busy almost constantly for the last six weeks. I've been driving back and forth from Lexington to Campbellsville, or Lexington to Lousiville, or any combination of those locales, a lot recently so I feel like I've hardly had time for myself. My nieces are still in the hospital but are doing great. They still receive some milk via feeding tube, so they can't come home until they're able to take 100% of their milk by bottle, but they are progressing nicely in this area. They've both also put on over a pound since birth and should both hopefully be a little over four pounds when they come home, which may or may not be at the same time.
We have all been incredibly blessed over the last six weeks to receive so much love, support, and prayers from people who will never really even be involved in the girls' lives. It's amazing how small communities pull together in times of crisis.
This past weekend was stressful. We had finally rescheduled the baby shower for Saturday the 14th, and so in order to get down there and start preparing for that, I went to Campbellsville after work Thursday evening. Unfortunately the road conditions were not good and my usual hour-and-a-half trip was stretched out to 2 hours and 20 minutes. It was agony and made me never want to get in a car again. But the baby shower went well, and I got to spend quite a bit of time at the hospital during the day on Friday, so all in all I would say it was a good weekend. I am exhausted, though, and I feel like this day of work has gone on forever.
I have been busy almost constantly for the last six weeks. I've been driving back and forth from Lexington to Campbellsville, or Lexington to Lousiville, or any combination of those locales, a lot recently so I feel like I've hardly had time for myself. My nieces are still in the hospital but are doing great. They still receive some milk via feeding tube, so they can't come home until they're able to take 100% of their milk by bottle, but they are progressing nicely in this area. They've both also put on over a pound since birth and should both hopefully be a little over four pounds when they come home, which may or may not be at the same time.
We have all been incredibly blessed over the last six weeks to receive so much love, support, and prayers from people who will never really even be involved in the girls' lives. It's amazing how small communities pull together in times of crisis.
This past weekend was stressful. We had finally rescheduled the baby shower for Saturday the 14th, and so in order to get down there and start preparing for that, I went to Campbellsville after work Thursday evening. Unfortunately the road conditions were not good and my usual hour-and-a-half trip was stretched out to 2 hours and 20 minutes. It was agony and made me never want to get in a car again. But the baby shower went well, and I got to spend quite a bit of time at the hospital during the day on Friday, so all in all I would say it was a good weekend. I am exhausted, though, and I feel like this day of work has gone on forever.
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